#*!@$# printers!

I’ve got a report to print out for Reader’s Digest (Canada). I hand in my work in hard copy because that’s the way it’s done. Heck, when I was last working in that office, the e-mail package of choice was Lotus Notes.

I look forward to handing in my reports because it gets me out of the house and into downtown Montreal, which is always a nice place to be in late spring, summer, and early fall.

We have two printers, both Epsons. Mine is three-in-one printer/scanner/copier, a gift from my generous father. It scans beautifully, but I don’t print enough to keep the ink from drying up – and if I did, a laser printer would be more economical. I usually use my wife’s printer, which is an older Epson Stylus Color 640 with cheaper ink. Between us, we use it enough to keep the ink from drying out.

Today, I tried to print out a report. I hadn’t looked, and the printer ran through the four remaining pages. I refilled it, hit the form-feed button, and the first page of the new sheaf jammed the printer. I unjammed it, but now the printer is printing only one or two rows of dots and dashes per page.

Is it crying for help in machine Morse code? It better be. I’m about to hit it with a sledgehammer. Nothing else will stop it.

My print jobs don’t show up in the queue. When I turn the printer off, it will wait mischievously until it comes back on and then starts spitting out dots and dashes again. Nothing I do will correct the printer’s misbehaviour. In my youth, I’d grab the opportunity to learn how to troubleshoot this. In my grumpy middle age, the only things I clench are my teeth. Any ideas out there?

Blogroll changes

I finally got off my duff (which is extremely lightly clad at the moment, by the way – and come to think of it, I’m actually still on it, technically). A few sites on the blogroll have entered cold storage for lack of posting, but that clears some room for new tenants.

Goodbye, Konrad and Velociraptors and a long overdue hello to several scribes, including Mystery Man (a fellow TriggerStreeter) and a number of other anonymous exhibitionists. There’s also Brit Andy Coughlan, who makes up for his forthright identity with the clever blog title of Screenwriting and Filmmaking Blog.

All the entries are full of good stuff and if they trend any way, it is to the writing aspect: dialogue, subtext, etc. Perhaps I’m compensating for my own lack of progress. All the kids have been spending all day at home for the last two weeks and I find it hard to concentrate on work. Most of my time has had to go to paid freelance work and preparation for the coming semester. And reading far too many blogs.

This afternoon, I’m off to the big DUBB wedding at which Giz, the lead singer, will marry Clement, the tromboner (that can’t be right) and bandleader. The bandleader plays the trombone, that is – it’s not a big wedding because she’s marrying two guys.

Bonus one-minute movie review:

I was all set to get to bed at a reasonable hour when “Mail Order Wife” came on the tube. It’s a documentary, sort of, of a New York City doorman who orders a woman from Burma. If you’ve seen it or know about it, you know what I’m not revealing. If you haven’t, it’s worth 92 minutes of your time.

What was instructive about the film for me is that none of the people in the dark comedy come off as positive, with the exception of the translator. That works, at least it does for me. It’s a sign that “Book of Trey” or whatever I’m calling it this month can work, too.